8 reasons your twin flame is ignoring you (and what to do about it)

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I am a runner to a runner/chaser twin flame dynamic. 

I intentionally and unintentionally ignore my twin flame for reasons I will reveal in this article.

As a runner, I’m here to tell you that most reasons your twin flame is ignoring you are internal.

It’s not always about what you did or did not do. 

By revealing the reasons in this article, I want to help you discover what resonates with you and your twin flame.

Why is your twin flame ignoring you? 

1) They are protecting you from themselves.

As I mentioned in my introduction, most runners have internal reasons for ignoring their twin flame. 

I commonly ignore my twin flame because I recognize what’s wrong with myself and don’t want my twin flame to suffer from my imperfections. 

I realize how much inner work I need to show up at my best for my twin flame and it wouldn’t work if I continued seeing him because I was bringing my mess to the table. 

This could be true for your twin flame, too. 

They could be ignoring you because they realize a flaw they need to work on to protect you and your connection. 

What you can do at this point is to be patient and dependable. 

Ignoring you could mean that they are feeling vulnerable and dealing with the intense emotion that comes from realizing they are the problem.

Your comfort and patience would help them go through their process without feeling guilty about healing themselves.

2) They have an avoidant attachment style.

I had an avoidant attachment style. I have been told that I’m confusing and I’m hard to read. 

People couldn’t really tell if I like them or not because in the beginning, I am happy and free to show interest, and then I pull away when I feel like we were getting too close. 

Have you explored the possibility that your twin flame is an avoidant, and that’s why they’re ignoring you?

They are avoidant if they:

  • have fear of rejection and abandonment
  • prioritize their independence over commitment to others
  • find it hard to trust other people

But you could look at this in a good light. 

This tells you that they see potential in both of you getting really close, but his avoidant nature prevents him from embracing that.

How do you deal with this, then? Here are three things you can do if you have an avoidant twin flame who ignores you

Be patient

He may need space and time to feel at ease with their own thoughts. Be patient with their process and use this opportunity to focus on yourself.

Don’t overthink it

This may sound harsh, but it’s not always about you. That’s a good thing! 

You’re not always the reason your twin flame is ignoring you.

Do not make up scenarios in your head that will cause stress and get you tempted to ask for reassurance. 

Remember, they need time and space.

Assure them that they can come back to you when he’s ready.

It’s common for us avoidants to feel guilty after spending some time away from our twin flames. 

Assure them that you’re willing to welcome them back into your life after a healthy reset. 

This would make them feel more comfortable talking to you about ways to deal with their feelings, knowing they didn’t scare you away and they can trust you.

3) They are scared to be vulnerable.

Do they open up about a sensitive topic? Do they engage in conversations that are considered deep and emotional? 

If not, they are probably scared to let their guard down and be vulnerable with you. 

Your twin flame has to feel safe and not be scared to show their soft side without feeling that they surrendered their masculinity

While this is something they should work on themselves, you can help them feel safe around you.

How do you make them feel safe? 

Watch out for their interests and things that matter to them. 

This could be their family, friends, a sport, or even a particular fashion trend. 

Show that you also take a keen interest in them and do not make insensitive comments that will make them feel bad about caring for these things. 

It is important to show you’re genuine with being part of their life, and they could be their true self with you without being judged and invalidated.

4) Physical distance doesn’t work for them

Do you agree with me when I say it’s very challenging to build trust and intimacy from a distance? 

The extra effort needed to maintain communication, the constant cry for assurance from your partner, and the loneliness – it’s not for everyone. 

If you and your twin flame are in a long-distance situation, it could be that it’s not working for them, and that’s why they are ignoring you. 

How do you make it work? 

Obviously, the best option is to be where they are, but if that’s not an option for now, here’s what you could try:

  • Having a dedicated time for long calls 

This has to be an uninterrupted and dedicated time of the day when you and your twin flame catch up without any time restriction. 

Putting thought into communicating and being present in a long-distance relationship is crucial in maintaining your connection. 

My sister and I have been doing this for years. 

It’s a game-changer because it fills the void and we get to be there for each other for the good and the bad.

  • Know when you’re going to see each other again.

Plan visits with them and give an expectation when they are going to see you again.

Having certainty that you will see each other again is a great way to provide assurance. 

This gives them something to hold onto and something to get excited about.

5) They are testing their connection with other people

Your twin flame could be testing their connection with other people for these reasons:

  • they are seeking validation
  • they are bored
  • they are exploring their options

Now, don’t panic. Your twin flame could also be testing their connection with other people to confirm their unique and special connection with you.

Your twin flame might be doubting their feelings, or they are overwhelmed with how special your connection is with each other.

They could be testing this by seeing other people and finding out whether they only feel it with you or could feel it with others too.

If you think your twin flame does this, it’s important that you give them time and space to realize how divine your connection is and what they want to do about it.

While they are going through this phase, it’s an opportunity for you to shift focus to yourself and stop chasing. 

Are you the reason your twin flame is ignoring you?

While most of these are internal, there may also be instances where you’ve caused them to ignore you. 

It’s nothing you should be too worried about. 

With the right intentions, you can always learn how to improve and be better for your twin flame.

These reasons could be:

1) You don’t know their love language

You have to admit it; being loved in ways that you WANT to feel loved is the only way you feel loved the most.

That’s true for your twin flame, too!

If you don’t know their love language, you probably haven’t done much to make them feel appreciated, loved, and cared for.

They could take this to mean that you’re not interested because you’re not expressing those interests in their love language. 

Or worse, that could signal to them that you’re not the right fit because you can’t satisfy their need to feel loved in ways that work for them, and that’s why he’s ignoring you. 

I remember complaining about a bad day to my twin flame.

As someone with physical touch as a love language, I prefer to be comforted through touch.

So when he spent the next 10 minutes being logical about what happened, not only I didn’t feel comforted, I felt it was wrong of me to feel what I felt. 

You probably had moments like this where you made him feel they could not trust you with their feelings if you don’t know their love language.

But it’s not too late. You could directly ask them what their love language is. 

If they don’t know, you can help them by asking these questions:

  • When you’re sharing a problem with me, would you like me to give you some advice, or you prefer that I listen and be close to you?
  • If you’re celebrating a milestone or an occasion, how do I keep up with the excitement? Gifts, words of affirmation, or cooking you a meal?

You could ask more questions or have them take a love language test. 

Knowing his love language should help you show your feelings in a language that they understand.

2) You’re not verbalizing your feelings enough

I used to complain to my twin flame that he didn’t compliment me enough or that he didn’t use his words to tell me what he was thinking.

This is frustrating! Am I supposed to assume that he likes me? 

Because I didn’t want to have the wrong assumption or put malice in an innocent gesture, I just decided that he doesn’t like me and we’re just friends. 

That stopped me from intentionally reciprocating what he gave, and later on, I just started ignoring him because I felt I was in a friend zone. 

You have to reflect on how you express your feelings. 

  • do you tell him how much you like it when he cooks for you? 
  • do you even say thank you when he opens doors for you?
  • do you tell him a scent at the mall reminded you of him?

It’s important that you do not get too comfortable with the fact that you are twin flames and you’re always going to be bonded. 

Just like any relationship, it takes conscious effort to maintain a connection. 

Verbalizing your thoughts and feelings helps your twin flame develop a sense of security around your connection.

So if you’re not verbal enough, that could be the reason he’s ignoring you.

3) You’re not giving them enough security

It’s not entirely your responsibility to make them feel secure. 

As individuals, we have a responsibility to find security in ourselves.

But when it comes to relationships, it’s a shared responsibility. 

If you’re the reason for your twin flame’s insecurities, that might be the reason they’re ignoring you. 

As their twin flame, you could help them feel the security in your connection by showing you’re committed to them and your divine connection. 

This goes back to knowing their love language and verbalizing your feelings. 

You could also ask them questions on how you can show your commitment and provide security.

Why is it important to understand their reasons?

It may be frustrating and scary to find out why they’re ignoring you. 

But it is a crucial stage in your twin flame journey to find out these reasons to have clarity on what both of you want to do moving forward with your relationship. 

Whether this period of understanding their reason leads to reunion or separation, clarity will help you both with closure.

What can you do if they are ignoring you?

There are unique approaches to each reason. 

Directly communicating with them is still the best option to get an accurate answer. 

If they are not willing to communicate with you, you may seek advice from a neutral third party.

It is also crucial for you to remember that losing a sense of self in trying to understand your twin flame’s behavior can negatively impact your well-being. 

It is important to prioritize self-love and set healthy boundaries in the process of saving your connection. 

Discover the truth about your twin flame connection

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